Weekly Tip # 87

The basic structure of my style coaching comes down to three concepts:

1) Connecting my clients to their True Selves 
2) Creating a Vision that they genuinely want
3) Using clothing as tool to get from where they are to their vision

My email this week is going to focus on the last concept, which is helping my clients to connect from where they are to their vision.  I’m going to share with you the steps I use to help clients go from where they are now towards their vision.  I’m actually going to use my 8 year-old daughter as an example, because don’t we learn the most from 8 year-olds?:)  

We recently took a road trip to Colorado, which is a good drive from where we are. Of course, our 8 year-old wanted to go with us because what’s in Colorado?….the mountains of course!!  She has not seen the mountains before and was extremely excited to see them.  

What my daughter wanted (her vision) was to see the Rocky Mountains. When we start out with a vision for our lives, it is not what we have now or what we are surrounded with currently It’s just that; a vision.  This can create a problem with believing in our vision, or thinking we will ever be able to create it, because our evidence for now does not reflect what we want to become.  For my daughter, she could not see any mountains and is surrounded by farmland and sandhills.  There is nothing in her surrounding environment that looks remotely like the Rocky Mountains.  Luckily, she still believes in us enough 🙂 to have faith that we can get her to the Rocky Mountains.  This is what I work with my clients on is having faith and considering the possibility that they could indeed reach their vision and just because they don’t see evidence of it now, doesn’t mean that they can’t create it.

The next step is to look for evidence as to why you could be that end vision of yourself.  What I like to do here is work with my clients with their style to bring in whatever the vision they have for their life is. This gives them a visual representation (evidence) for noticing that in their life right now.  Let’s refer back to the example of my daughter.  She was taking pictures along the way and when we were driving through Arnold, Nebraska.  Here is a picture for reference:
 

The landscape there has taller hills and is rockier than where we live.  Evidence found:  rockier, taller hills, starting to look like mountains. Now that she sees that visual representation, my daughter’s brain is looking for evidence of finding those mountains.  This reinforces her idea that she can reach her vision.  Our brains like to prove us right, my daughter noticed this and wanted to know…..are these the mountains?  Que excitement and joy…..but no, these are not yet. 

Next is holding the vision for yourself and creating the feelings you think that vision is going to bring you, while distracting yourself and enjoying the journey.  Sound like a tall order?  Yep, you bet.  Most adults cannot get through this without at least one major hiccup.  Adult brains as I said like to prove ourselves right and we have deep grooves of where our thoughts like to go.  Eight year-olds apparently do not have this problem yet.  My daughter listened to music, played games on my phone, took pictures of the sky ( I’m guessing because I found these on my phone camera) and enjoyed the journey.  Her focus wasn’t on if her vision was going to happen, but when.   She was enjoying the ride.

Pictures taken while playing on my phone:
 

The last step is the end vision!  

Was my daughter excited?  Yes!  Did she feel joyful and awe-inspired?  You betcha!  Here’s something I noticed though.  There was not a point on this journey when she didn’t feel that way.   How my daughter felt when she had a vision (see the Rocky Mountains):   excited, joyful, and awe-inspired
How she felt during the trip and was waiting to see her vision:  excited, joyful and awe-inspired.
How she felt when she saw the Rocky Mountains:  excited, joyful and awe-inspired.

Her feeling states were created first.  What gave her the ability to enjoy her journey was basically two things.  1) faith that she would get there (evidence) 2) feeling the feeling states she would feel she reached her vision.

That’s some powerful stuff.  No just for my 8 year-old, but everyone who has ever had a vision, or maybe just wanted to see the Rocky Mountains.


If you would like to get more curious about how to use your clothing to serve you, email me for a complimentary 30 minute session.  

Signaturestylelifecoaching@gmail.com


Kat Alder, MA
Fashion Translated Trained Stylist, Martha Beck Trained Life Coach
Signature Style Life Coaching